That Girl Thing

Proverbs 31:30 “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Being alone the rest of the story

This is a continuation of what I talked about at camp on Saturday night. I talked about being alone at school and in my faith.

At school I didn't help my situation. I looked at myself as the other people did. I told myself that no one wanted to be my friend or talk to me becasue of the way I dressed and looked and acted. One reason I looked at myself as others did is I didn't see myself fitting in with anyone at school so I stayed away. Another reason I looked at myself as others did is that a lot of people did try to tell me that I needed to change and tried to get me to do things that I knew were wrong. If I stayed away from them they couldn't tell me that. Still I could have done more to not feel so left out. There were some people who would have been nice to me and at least sat with me at lunch but I stayed away most of the time. That left me feeling alone almost all of the time.

I didn't really read my bible a whole lot but there were Christian things that got me through high school. Aside from camp there were things I heard on the radio. I heard someone say one day that girl's are God's princesses so I told myself that I was special to Him and that I was His princess. As silly as it sounds that helped. Another thing that helped was songs on the radio. I listened to Christian radio a lot. One song that I haven't heard in a long while but it came on occasionally when I was in high school was the song I'm not Cool by Scott Kirppayne. I loved that song becasue I could identify with it and it reminded me that God doesn't care if I fit into a certain crowd, how I dress, how I look or things like that, He just cares about me.

Most girls want friends, they want to fit in, and a lot of girls will do what it takes to fit in with the popular crowd. My advice to everyone is be yourself and don't try to do things to fit in. At the same time though don't look down on yourself, if you do you will find it hard to make friends. There is always someone out there who you can get along with even if you are a little different than them. Look for other Christians to encourage you, and encourage other Christiasn. Most of all remember God loves you no matter how you dress, look, or act and you belong to Him.

Ronda Putnam
Staff at TGT

dating

"Do you love him because you need him or do you need him because you love him?"

Thanks Josh! If anyone else would like to comment or ask any questions, please do!

So a few questions...

1.) How can a christian girl appropriately evaluate her relationship with a guy that she is dating to determine if this guy is someone she could potentially marry or someone that she should steer clear of?

2.) It's so hard to break off an unhealthy relationship with a guy especially when you feel lonely and feel that this person makes you feel good about yourself. How can girls learn to find value in God alone and be ok with being single?


Would anyone like to recommend any christian books about dating? I know some of my favorite books are ones written by Michelle McKinney Hammond. I highly recommend all of her books to you. You can find her books at any christian bookstore.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

What Christian Guys really think!!!

A guy wants to have a “girlfriend” in Junior High and High School just to be a companion. I put that in parenthesis because in these years that is what a girl is to a guy: just a companion/girlfriend. They are not thinking about the future just for the time. They also will pick out a girl just to fit in with the “IN” crowd because that is the way that the “world” lives by and tells them to go by.
In College there usually begins a change, a guy becomes a Man and begins to see things differently because he is looking for a wife that he can spend the rest of his life with. A Godly man will look for a girl that has evidence of Growth in her spiritual walk. This is seen by the fruit of her labor. He will also look for someone that is about pleasing God and not about pleasing the world. He looks for the one that God has brought into his life for the rest of his life, and not just for the season. This is about Guys that have a relationship with Christ. The ones that do not have a relationship with Christ you STAY AWAY from. God has someone picked out especially for you and you need to take the time to seek HIS face and trust that in HIS timing it will be revealed to you.

Some scripture for you to think on!

Romans 12:4 “ And do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains favor from the Lord.”

Proverbs 31:10 "Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies."

Let us know your thoughts, questions, comments!

IN CHRIST
Josh Caines
FBC Ludowici, Youth Pastor

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Notes from Friday night's message


FRIDAY NIGHT TGT 2009

Tonight you have a choice. A choice that you have been destined to make upon your birth in to this journey we call life. For too long, we have taken this choice lightly and believed there to be three possible answers when there really are only two. What is this choice? Tonight, to explain the possible answers, I will use a color system to help us visualize and think more about the choices. Your choice tonight is you will serve.

For never were there or are there two more opposite colors. White is neutral, stainless, transparent, pure and no darkness can be added to it. The people that live in the white tonight are those that have totally surrendered themselves to Jesus Christ, they live for Him that died for them and lack nothing. They live with purpose. They have hope because of Jesus Christ and have faith through the hard times in life because they have Jesus as a father and protector and know they have much to look forward to.

Black is deep, dark and tainted. No light can shine through. It's a color that we associate with gloom, with moruning. The people that live in the black tonight are self-indulgent, and living without purpose for their master satan.

Bibically, these are the two ways we can respond to the question of whom we will choose. We can either choose to surrender our lives to Jesus Christ or to surrender our lives to the world.

I think a lot of us, however have lived as if another area existed. We will call this the “in between” ..the gray area.

The group of people that I believe to be in this gray area are those that are Christians yet are ones that are trying to have the best of both worlds, so to speak. These are the people that love Christ but that don’t love Him enough to get beyond living with world. These are the people that are trying to hold the hand of God and of the world. And because they are holding the hand of the world and God, they are stagnant and will never be able to truly be all that God wants them to be and fufill the purpose that God has for their lives.


I want to make a guess that a majority of you tonight are living in this gray area comfortably. For in this area, you can have the “best” of both worlds. You can be “christlike” around those that you need to be such as your youth leaders, certain adults and certain friends and in participation in Christian activities. On the flip side, you can be worldly around those you need to be and participate in worldly activities. For black and white together make gray so certainly, it is logical for us all to think in our human minds we can have a mixture of both colors in our lives? !

We see however in scripture that gray does not exist!

Matthew 6:24, “You can not serve two masters, ... you can not serve both God and the god of this world.” James 1:8- “A double-minded man is unstable in all his ways.” In Revelation, we read“Because you are neither hot nor cold and are lukewarm, the lord wants to spew those out of his mouth.” So that basically tells us that God is sicknened by those who live a double standard, those who try to live in black and white. So we see now that this gray category must be diminished because it never has nor will it ever exist. I believe there are those of you tonight who can knowingly say that you are living in this gray area.

Sadly, I believe there to be a great many of you tonight that truly think you are living in the white, that being that you truly have surrendered everything to Jesus Christ but you are mistaken. For we as “Christians” have come to believe that there are only certain sins that are sins or that God actually recognizes as sin and we all know them as- drugs, alcohol abuse, sex outside of marriage. Am I wrong? From my years working here as a staffer, and my years with TGT..those are the answers that we as leaders always receive when we say “sin.” So this presents a problem when we think that because we aren’t engaging in those sins that we are immune from sin period. I wanna tell you tonight that although satan has not gotten you in those areas of your life, you can be certain that he’s already slowly working on another area of your life and it’s dangerous, very dangerous to believe that you are immune and well guarded. You see when we let our guards down and become prideful, we become blind to darkness and the poison it renders in our lives. I say to you tonight, do not become prideful and think you are immune to the traps of the devil. Do not underestimate the power he can have over an unprepared person who has let their guard down!

Since I believe there to be a lot of people in this room tonight that may falsely believe they are living in the white area thus believing they have fully surrendered every area over to Jesus Christ, I want us tonight to examine other possible ways that satan may be attacking in your life so that if there are other areas that satan is attacking, you can identify the area and surrender it to Him tonight.



MAIN POINTS

A.) Satan will deceive you in believing that what God says, he doesn’t really mean.

Our culture and Christians alike will try to justify God’s word so that it accomadates what they want to do however I tell you tonight that what God says ,he means! Proverbs 30:5 says “every word of God is flawless” which means what God says, he in fact means! Therefore His words are not left open to our justification.

I think back to a bumper sticker that says- God Says it, I believe it, that settles it! I think this sticker to be absolutly incorrect. For it doesn't matter what you and I believe. What you and I believe does not make what God says true or not true. If God says in His word that it's right..it's absolutly right! If God says in His word that it's wrong..then it's absolutly wrong! There are no ifs, ands or buts about it!

There will come a point if there already hasn’t where you will want to do something that you know is wrong and you will be tempted to justify what you are doing maybe because nobody sees you doing it, because nobody knows you are doing it or because you feel it will not hurt anyone! You are wrong! God sees you doing it, He knows you are doing it and He will be hurt! Anything against the word of God is WRONG..there is no ifs, ands or buts..there is no in betweens! It is wrong, wrong, wrong! Know your bible, know His precious word so that when satan tries to deceive you in saying that God doesn’t mean what he said, that you can remember – Psalm 119:11-thy word have I hid in my heart that I will not sin against thee,” and Joshua 1:8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Base all of your words, choices and actions on the word of God alone!


From Genesis through revelation, we read about the consequences of those who were deceived by satan to believe that God didn’t really mean what he said. We remember the story of Adam and Eve where God told them directly to not eat from the tree yet they did anyways. Because of this direct action, we humans continue to see the consequences of their sin even thousands of years later. May this be a sign of seriousness to you! What God says, he means! Again I say to you, no matter what other Christians are doing, do not go against this word of God! Use the word of God as your standard to everything that you do. Do not be deceived tonight by believing that what God says he doesn’t mean.




B.)God is not concerned about things up to sexual acts that aren’t sex (also guarding your mind)

I know that some of you tonight are in middle school and years ago, it may have seemed inappropriate to talk to your age group about this but as many times as I have seen 12 and 13 year olds pregnant, I don’t feel it is too early at all. I believe that there are those of you tonight that have committed to be a virgin until marriage but have fallen into the trap of believing that as long as you are not having sex then you are in fact pure and in the clear. This however is not true! This is just another one of satan’s schemes to help you justify getting what you want or what your boyfriend wants. I was your age once too and I know that there are guys that have tried to compromise your virginity and when you have said “no,” they have mentioned other alternatives that would be “ok” since you weren’t “crossing the line.” May we all be reminded of scripture that says “whatever is pure and holy, think of these things” and “blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.” If what your boyfriend or friends is talking about is not pure and not God-pleasing then it is wrong. Often too many times, I think girls question “how far is too far?” I honestly don’t see that question as a true question of innocence but one of wanting to know what they can get away with! If you question it, it’s wrong! If you have to think about it, it’s wrong!

Also may we all be reminded tonight that thinking something is just as dangerous as commiting the act although the consequences may be different. Romans 8:6- For to be worldly minded is death but to be spiritually minded is peace.” Do not be deceived into thinking that thinking inappropriate thoughts about your boyfriend is ok or even looking at dirty pictures. For it is wrong!


Do not be deceived tonight into thinking that anything outside of sex is ok and that if you just think something, you are not in the wrong.



  1. Satan will deceive you into believing that you are worthless. Satan will deceive you into thinking that you have no value unless you dress a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way, hang out with the right people, date the cool guys and have the right things. Girls, I cannot tell you how dangerous a low self-esteem is!Because of low self-esteem, there are girls that belittle others in an effort to make themselves feel better about who they are. Because of a low self-esteem, there are girls who are battling eating disorders because they feel they need to be the same size as the super model in the magazine or the celebrity on t.v. Because of low-self esteem, there are girls that compromise their sexual purity to please the popular guy on campus. Because of low self-esteem, there are girls that are involved in alochol and drugs to fit in with the popular girls at school. Because of low self-esteem, there are girls who are thinking about suicide or who have already gone through it. I say to you tonight, do not let satan and his world dictate to you how you can find worth or how you can feel better about yourself.

We, as christian women, need to look away from the world and look to God's holy word to find our worth. Psalm 139:14 says “For I am fearfully and wonderfully made. “ Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.” Isaiah 49:16

Zephaniah 3:17- He will take great delight in you,

He will quiet you with His love,

He will rejoice over you with singing.

From this scripture, we should realize that God's character goes into the creation of every human on this earth. He created every aspect of you just the way He wanted to. From the color of your eyes, to the size of your feet....He lovingly created you to be you, different from everyone else. When he was finished, he saw it was good and was pleased. Can you imagine the pain God must feel when we look in the mirror and wish we looked like someone else. Oh the pain he must feel, when we bash his very creation!

Know God made you just the way you are for a reason and your security is not found in your looks or things that you have, it is found in the Lord alone!!

Do not let satan deceive you into believing that you are worthless or that your value is found in worldly things.


  1. Satan will deceive you into thinking that It’s ok to look out for self above others.

    1.) selfish (all about self) – do you know someone that only talks about themselves? They may ask how you are but you know they don't care. They may even be the type to use you as an ego boost such as saying things so that you constantly are praising them to tell them how great they are.

    These are the people that are so concerned about themselves that they don't truly reach out to others and love like God has called us to love. For they are too wrapped up in their personal lives to care about others. This selfishness is dangerous because it keeps people from truly reaching out to others and loving them as God loves us. If Jesus, who is perfect can humble himself to reach out to others and put others first, then so should we.

    Phillipians 2:3- Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, consider others better than yourself. Each of you should look not only to your own interests but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same of Christ Jesus.

    I think we can be selfish in not telling others about Jesus Christ.

    A lot of girls truly think that it is not their job to tell others about Jesus Christ and that it is the job of the youth pastor or sunday school teacher. This may be because this is how they became a christian so therefore they don't think it's their task. However, we read in scripture that God says that it is all of our jobs to tell others about Jesus Christ. He calls us to go into all the world and tell others about Jesus Christ. It is a selfish and lazy spirit that does not think it's their job to tell others about Christ. Think tonight of the person who told you about Jesus Christ and who took the time to invest in you. This is the spirit that God has called us to have so let us have that spirit and reach others for Him.

    2.) Or you may be one to share God with certain people that appear in your eyes “cool” enough to talk to but yet you ignore others, others that don't necessarily fit into group. Be reminded tonight that God does not show favoritism and that He loves all His people just the same as you should love them too. God didn't die for just a certain type of people..he died for all people. Don't show favortism to who you share Christ with, God calls all to rependence. Next time you see a person that you are starting to judge, look beyond the fleeting outward appearance and see their heart. For their heart is the same as yours. A broken tattered heart that has been tossed and turned by the world. A heard that needs a mender. A heard that needs a saviour just like you have.

  2. Acts 10:34-35

34Then Peter began to speak: "I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism 35but accepts men from every nation who fear him and do what is right.

Roman 2:11- For God does not show favoritism.

And since God does not show favoritsm, then neither should we.

    3.) One can also be selfish with the talents and gifts that the Lord has blessed them with.

    Some of us tonight, choose to believe that for some reason that the talents and gifts we have is because we for some reason deserve them or because it's because of our selves that we have them so we get into this mindset that when we use these talents even if they are at a christian place, that it's all about showing everyone how good we are at a specific talent or how much better we are than someone else at it.

    When we “perform” with our talents instead of “worshipping,” it is worthless. God knows the motives of our hearts and if's for self-interest, we don't gain credit in God's eyes, we may in the world's eyes but like I said it's worthless if it's for the world's eyes. Do not be selfish in thinking your talent is because you somehow deserve it. Use your talent soley for worshipping the Lord and not to compete with others or show others how good you are at it.

    4.) Selfish- We can also be selfish when we put things in front of God. Truly think about how much time you spend thinking about worldly things such as money, clothing, cars, hair, your looks and your weight versus how much time you spend thinking about what is eternal in Jesus Christ. Seriously think about that for a moment. Think of today or even back to yesterday. What is your answer? If you had to answer that you truly think about the world a lot more than may we all be sad and ashamed that we would focus on what is fleeting rather than what is eternal.

    I'm not saying that it's not ok to have nice things but at the same time, I think a lot of us have really justified our obession with the things of this world. We have really justified it being ok to think about worldly things that we need constantly to make us look better or live better. I gurantee you that if you spent more time with Jesus Christ, a lot of these things would not be important to you. And really, let's be honest. It's all for a show for other people. You may say it's not, but it is.

    If you were the last person on earth and you had access to any name brand store you wanted to go to, any car dealership, and any house...would it really matter? It might seem cool for about the first day but then it would quickly be meaningless because you wouldn't have anyone to show your new gucci clothes off to, your new jaguar off to, or your new mansion. It would be utteraly meaningless.

    The sad thing is that these things are meaningless right now at this very moment even though we do have people to show these things off to.

    Mark 8:36 says “What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? “

Stop focusing on the things that are fleeting and worthless, focus on what's eternal. You will never have all that the world can offer. You will never be rich enough, never have all the expernsive clothes, you will never have the best house, you will never have the best car. You will never measure up by worldy standards but thank God, you can measure up to what God wants from you. Let go of these idols, these obessions tonight, and take hold of what is eternal.


Conclusion


Are you in the black? Have you been so blinded by the darkness of the world that you couldn't see the light of Jesus Christ?2 Cor. 4:4- In satan, whom is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of him who believes not, not letting the light of the glorious gospel of Jesus Christ shine unto them.” Are you a slave to the one who seeks to destroy you? Tonight, you can turn to Jesus and get out of this black and live in the white for Him. No matter where you've been in your journey and no matter where you are, Jesus will take your tainted black heart and cleanse you and make you pure tonight.

Are you in the gray tonight? Before tonight, maybe you truly thought you were living in the white but you have realized from things that I have said or even things that maybe I didn't that God convicted you of, that you are in fact living in the gray. Because of your ties to the world, you have never been all that God would have you to be. Tonight, you can break those ties to the world by recommiting yourself to Jesus and offering a totally surrendered heart and lifestyle unto Him. Isn't it time you stop living an area that God is disgusted by and truly says does not exist in His eyes?

Joshua 24:15 says “Choose ye this day who you wil serve.”

The time is now to make the choice, you choose tonight.


Wednesday, November 11, 2009

TGT 2009

Hello!!

Welcome to our Blog site! Please use this site to ask questions, share scripture, share poems, personal writings, share what God is teaching you, and just to keep in touch with the TGT staff!

God worked in tremendous ways this weekend, and my prayer is that you will stand firm on the commitments that you made. Surrender every aspect of your life to Jesus Christ..place Jesus above all else in your life and may the world know you by your love!

YOU SET THE EXAMPLE! THE TIME IS NOW!

1 Timothy 4:12

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity."



If I can be of any assistance to you. Please email me at stephanie@thatgirlthing.com